The Right Place and Time

[ben2ong2]

Before we proceed, let us tell you how John (not his real name) tries to meet women.

It is Friday about 10:00 PM. He calls his buddies and they get together over at his place for a drink. The “initial injection”, they call it. They talk about girls and everyone brags (sometimes they even lie to impress their buddies) about “past successes” with girls. They have about 2 drinks each and call a cab or let the most sober guy drive to the club. It is already about 11:45 PM. John and his buddies get to this very busy, “upscale” club where it is “full of hotties” or “full of eye candy” or whatever they label it.

At the club, John stares at good-looking “chicks” but he does not know how to start a conversation with them. He tries something like “Hey, what’s up!” but most of the times girls don’t even pay attention to him. He then starts restlessly walking around the club eyeing girls and trying another “What’s up!”

He thinks, “I need to drink some more so I can bring up my confidence”. So, he has about 2-3 more vodkas or crown-and-cokes. By that time it’s already getting late, he is seriously boozed up. Now he can “talk”. Now he is the “real man”.

So our buddy starts hitting on almost every woman at the club…He is drunk and has the “spunk” but all he can say is booze-inflicted gibberish. And he does not realize it.

Needless to say he goes home alone.

But on the next day, while recovering from the hangover, he would call his buddies for the regular “after-club report”, arguing how he really tried and “almost picked up” the most beautiful girl (yeah, sure-he does not even remember her face nor name) at the club.

All this was going on for 2 years and needless to say he could not find a girlfriend. He had not had sex since college where he met his ex at a party. In despair, he contacted us and asked us for help.

John’s problem was that he was stuck in the “club scene”. But he is not the only one. Even though clubs may look like a hot place to meet women, the truth is clubs are some of the toughest scenes. The reasons are numerous. Women are scared of strange drunk guys trying to hit on them. They are not only scared, they are disgusted. 99% PER CENT OF THE TIME, WOMEN DO NOT GO FOR SUCH A CHEAP DEAL. What they really hate is drunk guys trying to lick their feet like puppies and that can easily be manipulated.

So, our advice, dear friend, is to watch your drinks when going on a “pick-up session”. This will not increase your confidence. Just the opposite-drinking will impair your senses and make you inadequate. Needless to say, girls can tell when a guy is drunk and will not go for that.

Another precious advice is not to rely on the tough club scene to find a mate. There are a lot better ways and places to “hook up”. Some of the best places are:

- Parties
- Happy hours
- The library
- Art events, expos and many others.