Our Dating Dislikes

[charleychacko]

Dating dislikes are a personal thing that's for sure. The things one person loves someone for can be the cause for divorce in another case. You may love the way they smile with one gold tooth, wink from under their sunshades, flick their dyed orange hair or paint their nails blue, that is your prerogative of course. There are though some common trends that we all share when dating anyone.

1. The top of the list by far in the league of dating dislikes is hygiene. You may laugh at this but believe me, it is often overlooked, especially by men. Turning up for a date doesn't just mean a quick rake of the hair and the straightening of a T shirt. Remember, first impressions count and may be the only impression you leave. Before a date get yourself to the chemist and then to the bathroom (guys) and sort yourselves out. Have a shave, wash your hair, scrub up well and get suited and booted. It is your chance to shine so make sure you are shining. Yeah, okay you may be a jeans and T shirt kind of guy. Leave that until later. Brush your teeth for two straight minutes, wear deodorant and Aftershave ( a little of the good stuff only please) and put on a shirt! If I need to refer a woman to hygiene then enough said.

2. Clothes are big dating dislikes. The wrong clothes that is. The amount of times I have witnessed a good looking girl dressed immaculately only to discover her new man wearing an anorak in a trendy bar, a T-shirt in a restaurant, jeans to the theater. It breaks one's heart. The fact is, a first date is very important. Once again its the time for you both to shine. You don't need to be wearing Gucci or Armani though it can help on occasions but you should be comfortable too. So smart casual can be good depending on your date. This is often why I recommend dating first at lunchtimes mid week. You are already dressed for work so you may already be wearing a suit. If not and your job is manual then leave the first date until evening. But for men you should wear a shirt and trousers and look presentable. No garish Hawaii kit at this stage guys. For women , something understated and stylish but with a hint of chic. Once again, too tight, too short or too fashionable may leave you feeling wrongly dressed for the wrong date and wishing you hadn't bothered.

3. Money. Hmm yes money. A big issue this one in the dating dislikes list. Too flash and your out. Too downtrodden and you are out guys. Too much chat about cash and you are out, too little ambition and you are out. Seriously, keep your cash conversations to a zero level and enjoy your date together. If you want to talk about ambitions avoid chatting about your brining desire for a a Lear jet and a house in the Hamptons. If you aspire to be Gordon Gecko cool but don't ram it down your date's throat. Money, contrary to many impressions doesn't impress at first, it simply polarizes views. It can leave your date feeling very uncomfortable either way. If you are dating out of your financial zone then don't try and pretend as that will be fatal. Instead always keep to something affordable, after all, you are spending time with someone, not their wallet or purse. If you do happen to be a millionaire, keep that until your 4th date!

4. Lying. People tell lies on dates, in fact most people do and this is a great dating dislike. They do this because they want to appear exciting and invigorating and interesting. This means that some of the things you are told are not true, or only partially true. Usually in any good dating scenario these little white lies get played out and over laughter, good conversation and a drink the truth escapes easily as you both relax. Whilst entertaining, little white lies show the path towards dating disaster. People are in fact seeking honesty and this is one of the basic building blocks of any new dating experience. Get caught out later at your peril.

5. Getting drunk. Here lays the true path to disaster. Okay if you are a student and young then much dating is to be had near the bars of many college campuses and I for one have many fond memories. However as we get older the anti is raised and so we need to keep out wits about us. Girlfriends have told me that the most promising dates they have been on have gone nowhere simply because their dates got lashed on Vodka or beer. Now 99% of the reason behind this is nerves. Many people are far better with a drink inside them than without. It's a relaxant, it calms nerves and fears and promotes a feeling of confidence. In that sense, a drink is good for dating, the problem is that it doesn't end there. If you go to far in the early stages of dating you can simply end up undoing all your good work. If you are nervous you can end up drinking too much and making a fool of yourself. So whilst drinking can be fine, leave it out at this stage of your dating game plan.